Aaron Judge started at center field yesterday for the Yankees. No biggie, really. He was scooped up by the Yankees out of Fresno State as a CF. Never mind that Baseball Reference lists Judge at 6-7, 282lbs. That’s about how big Lou Ferrigno was in the movie Pumping Iron. Giancarlo Stanton was in right. The award for highest bench press in the outfield goes to …
Yu Darvish struggled in his Cubs debut. Darvish, who signed on for the Cubbies at 6 years and $126 million large, threw just over 4 innings while succumbing to the Fish’s bats at a hook of 5 hits, 5 runs, and only 4 K’s. We say only 4 strikeouts because Yu couldn’t put batters away when he needed to. For a guy who has a higher career K-Rate than The Ryan Express, he should sling and spin better than this. No sweat, tho, it’s freezing cold most everywhere that ain’t the beach and it’s early spring. Tune in next Friday as the Cubs head to Miller Park against the Brew Crew.
The Houston Astros pulled an Okie-Doke against the Rangers the other day. Big dog and resident baseball destroyer Joey Gallo walked up to the plate and saw this:
Yes, Alex Bregman (hot corner for the ‘Stros), is sittin’ pretty in left field, as he joins the real outfielders on the team as the 4th in the band. Gallo hit the ball right to him. Sorcery, we tell you! These Hahhvahhd data kids are wicked bonkers, man.
Josh Donaldson and Matt Carpenter both have dead arms at third base. We hope their arms come back to life. Someone call that voodoo medicine woman off Weekend at Bernie’s 2, give us the playlist for that primo reggae music, and let’s get these arms dancing! Donaldson is gonna play DH, and hopefully The Cardinals put in Jedd Gyorko because he’s on our fantasy baseball team. He’s a husky guy and we could use some home runs.
God-Dang David Price may be back! He says he learned a lot last year and is ready to put, oh, I don’t know, his temper tantrums on the bus with Hall of Famers and all that 5-year-old moodiness toward the media in the past and pitch his game. Well, call him Bob Ross because on Friday he painted a gem with beautiful brush strokes over the corners, which was a great play because his velocity is somewhere in Tampa Bay. You can catch more honeys being fly, and if you don’t have the velocity, paint the corners with honey. That’s the saying, right? He threw 7 innings on 76 pitches, just so you know.
Mike Trout started the 2018 season 0-6. For that one day he was below replacement level, which is bonkers because his WAR is probably higher each year than your 5 favorite players on your favorite team. One time I was picked up by a tornado, so, yeah, weird stuff happens in baseball sometimes. Rest easy, universe, he’s swingin’ .444 since with 3 extra base hits and 1 strikeout. He’ll end the season with over 10.0 in the WAR department because he’s getting better. Scary, right?